In case you were absent / off grid this year

In case you were absent / off grid this year, don’t worry, - this is a quick recap of what happened in 2019 on Planet Earth (don’t be confused with the BBC series that aren’t trendy as mine(s)).

•          Jump of the year. Masai’s running for his life from bloodthirsty deputy at the end of the game six and jumping into Lowry’s lap that felt more like a sanctuary.
•         (That) hairstyle is getting momentum. In (these) times of political correctness we don’t call that weird nor odd anymore. The one, south of the border is kind of getting his hair (along with the economy) in order. (It is) still to be seen if his disciple across the pond will be able to do (both).
•      Crystal ball(ers). The US (sports) media were brilliant predicting in unison 4:2 in the Finals. Wrong colors though.
•        (Mass) shootings (south of the border). Wait..., nah, every year/month/week the same. Not the news per say...
•          (Royal) feud(s). It was boring to death the ordinary royal family (the way it should be). And here comes ... Meghan Merkel in the red corner...
•          Girl on a mission. Greta. No, sadly not the Phoenix Greta. I know... The difference between her and Don Cherry are (very) marginal. Both gather big crowds, get (media) pass for misspeaking, don’t give a shit what I think about them, etc.  One said: “...how dare you. You have stolen my dreams and my childhood...”. The next seconded: “...you people that come here, whatever it is, you love our way of life, you love our milk and honey...” . I think they should’ve split the trophy, like Michael and Karl (almost) did in 97.
•           And here comes the winner.  Easy! Pretty sure everyone has seen these pictures of the heavy traffic jam of mountain climbers lining up to the (Everest) summit. And you complain for being stuck on Crowchild/Gelezinio Vilko, etc...? You people!